Summary
I grew up in a loving Christian home, but at 12 I was shocked into secret shame when my friend showed me pornography in a tree stump π. Guilt and fear battled with a powerful rush of curiosity that drove me into a hidden addictionβsearching through catalogs and sneaking lateβnight internet sessions. I became a master of a double life: leading campus Bible studies by day while chasing lustful fantasies by night. My marriage brought a fleeting hope, but the weight of lies and sexual sin only deepened the darkness. In July β99, after confessing everything in a raw unloading, my world crumbled when my wife walked away π. At rock bottom, I faced two pathsβdeath or returning to the Lover of my soul. I chose to run back into Godβs arms, trusting in His grace to heal my brokenness and set me free π₯π.
Time Chapters
01:02 Introduction to pornography
05:20 Searching for erotica
09:15 Building a double life
12:30 College freedom & secret encounters
21:30 Confession & wifeβs departure
23:00 Decision to return to God
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Jonathan talks about the childhood influences that helped mold him into a major sex addict.
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