Summary

SummaryMy name is Tori Hope Petersen, and for years, I moved through life feeling unloved and unwanted. 🥺 When I first entered the foster care system, SWAT teams burst into our home, and I spent my childhood shuttling between a dozen foster homes. That instability left me questioning my identity and convinced me that I wasn’t lovable. 💔

Even after I found Christ, I realized I was unconsciously repeating unhealthy patterns—seeking out people who hurt me and rejecting those who truly cared for me. One Christmas, I remember gifting the very best present to a church leader who never truly loved me, while my own family received second-rate gifts. That moment exposed how I chased rejection and ran from acceptance. 🎁 In the pain of that realization, I had to face the lie that I didn’t belong or deserve love.

I also struggled privately with mental health—feeling suicidal even while preaching to youth in group homes and juvenile detention. 🥀 Every night after sharing God’s love, I would lie in bed flooded with lies: “You’re not worthy. No one accepts you.” I had to learn to sit in holy loneliness, let God’s truth speak over those lies, and distinguish my trauma from God’s character. 🌟

Through prayer, Scripture, and community, I discovered that the same love I proclaimed to others was available to me. Now, I have the privilege of fostering a 16-year-old daughter, walking with her through the brokenness of the system. 👩‍👧 Even when the foster care world still feels broken, I see God’s redeeming power at work—bringing healing, identity, and hope.

To anyone stuck in destructive cycles or unsafe situations: tell your story to someone you trust. 🗣️ As you recount those patterns, you’ll recognize how God has been with you all along—and begin to hand those areas over to Him for true healing. 🙏✨

At some point everyone finds themselves wondering…
Why do I keep falling into the same patterns that leave me feeling broken?
Will I ever move past the pain and experience healing?
Is there something wrong with me?

Bestselling author Tori Hope Petersen shares the profound ways she finally found relief and healing from the pain of her past, and how you can too. Tori gently shows you why it’s important to recognize the destructive personal, relational, and generational patterns in your life so you can finally find freedom.

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Time Chapters
 
01:02 Childhood Trauma Patterns
03:00 Gift Revelation
04:59 Trusting God vs Trauma
08:59 Hidden Mental Struggles
11:45 Becoming a Foster Mom
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